Fake it till you Make it? Try this instead…

The process of career and skill development is a long one. It is continuous, with multiple layers and timelines. Part of the journey is being able to recognize the skills necessary to achieve your goals at any given time, then to identify which of those skills you have and which you need to develop.

This seems straightforward, but like most things it can get tricky. The process of skill identification has its pitfalls, which are often experienced in one of two scenarios:

(1) the lacking skillset affects the person’s ability to be exposed to opportunities to learn the skill or,

(2) the lacking skillset invites a sense of self-doubt that causes a person to ignore or miss an opportunity to develop that skill.

Enter “Fake it till you make it” — a common adage based on the idea that if one presents as if they know or have a skill they have not yet acquired, they can (a) trick their brains into learning that skill and (b) gain access to development opportunities that may not have been available if that skill were perceived to be lacking.

While it is not likely that the phrase was intended for the professional development space, “fake it till you make it” has been adopted by the business community, especially in sales environments. There are people that swear by it, and there is some research to suggest it works. The catch, however, is that the positive associations with the concept of “fake it till you make it” are mostly behavioral, not skill based, or as one article in Psychology Today said, “There is a gigantic difference between "faking" courage when phobic and pretending to know how to pilot a plane.”

And therein lies the catch: it is one thing to hold yourself in a posture of confidence in an unfamiliar place or to smile when you don’t feel like it in the hopes it will eventually turn your frown upside down. It is another thing to trick yourself, co-workers or clients into thinking you can do something you cannot. So instead of faking it, consider trying these alternatives:

Flag it

Development of new knowledge and skill requires an understanding of what you don’t know. It can be helpful to take note of and track specific experiences you need in order to advance on your professional goals and expertise. Write it down. This makes it easier to recognize when those opportunities present themselves, and to communicate what professional development you seek when speaking to mentors and leaders.

However, not all those skills will be easy to map out. Sometimes, as they say, “you don’t know what you don’t know”. Of course, no one wants to be seen as lacking, but in those cases where a missing skillset becomes obvious without much warning, avoid the reflexive action of ignoring the lack of expertise to save face. Instead, own it. Flag it. Add it to the list.

Ask it

There are few professional development tools more powerful than a good question. That is especially true as you navigate what you don’t know. So, don’t be afraid to ask questions. Avoid those that are close-ended and only require a “yes” or “no” response. Instead, ask questions that will stimulate additional thought. “Why” and “How” are lead-ins that tend to frame questions in a way that the provoke deeper and more thoughtful responses — which leads to more information being shared.

Of course, some people avoid asking questions because they are concerned that doing so will only highlight the fact that they don’t know something. That may be true to some extent, but good questions can actually do the opposite. A thoughtful question can show an individual’s grasp of important nuances and allow the person responding to do so in a way that is intended to teach rather than simply inform. Even when a question does alert a lack of knowledge, it can also highlight that there is a willingness to learn and intelligence to know how to get information needed.

Communicate it

There is nothing wrong with telling people about the things you need to learn. In fact, there are some people (mentors, sponsors, coaches, career and learning development professionals, etc.) that should know where you lack knowledge or skill. By sharing where you need development, you are allowing others see how they can help you get there.

Of course, there may be situations where you don’t want to share everything with everyone, and that also makes sense. Part of mapping out what you don’t know and what you would like to learn is understanding where (and from whom) you get information. Sometimes it will be more appropriate to hold your cards closer to your chest. Just make sure the reason you are doing so isn’t only about ego. Skill development may be a slow, but forward progression must occur, and ego will only slow you down (if not stop progression in its tracks).

Trust it

You may not even realize you have learned something until you need to access and/or use the knowledge. In the meantime, in the space between “I don’t know” and “I do know”, negative thinking can set in. There have been several articles and studies focused on things like imposter syndrome and other self-defeating prophesies related to how much knowledge or expertise we perceive ourselves to have (or not to have). This type of thinking can not only derail or slow progress, it can be a physical and emotional beatdown.

If you find yourself in that space, it can be helpful to turn from what you don’t know to what you do know. What skills have you already developed? How are they applicable/transferable to where you are and what you are looking to learn? Use this as fuel to keep moving.

Have a hard time getting into that mindset? I’m reminded of some advice given to me by a colleague and friend years ago when I was struggling to see my own growth. She suggested that I keep what she called a “good-days” file.

As she suggested, anytime I received positive recognition for something I did, I kept it. Each piece of positive feedback, each kind email or kudos, anything I authored that was published or made part of an internal communication, any awards, etc. — I filed it in a folder on my computer desktop. To this day, when I start to feel the negative creep in, I read through some of the items in that file. It serves as a reminder that this is a process, a journey, and we are doing it right if we are moving forward, no matter how slow it seems.

So, hoping you remember the good-days: the things you already know and the incredible things you have already done. I hope it serves as proof you don’t need to fake anything to make it. You are already on your way.